Hello to you my friend, it’s been a while. I hope you have been well, and enjoying your time of the year wherever you are.
For some people it’s been one helluva summer, while for others its been just cool and dry.
My heart goes out to everyone affected by the heatwave and wildfires, especially to the people in Spain and Portugal.
To my fellow Nigerians, well, it’s lots of rain now so the weather is quite enjoyable. While the state of things in the country is a form of heat, it is going to get better. Just hang in there or change your country.
Okay that’s a joke. Or maybe not. When you don’t find things conducive anymore and you have the opportunity to relocate, please don’t hesitate. Also, come take me with you.
Let’s get to it then.
Not too long ago, my focus lacked a bit of focus, leading to an overwhelming sense of loss.
One thing is certain, that nothing scares me more like when I feel flustered about a thing that should ordinarily bring me joy and happiness.
How It All Started
At the beginning of the year, I started writing applications to go back to school. That s at the end of application is not one or two, it’s actually a whole lot of them (well, less than ten but definitely more than two.
Barely four months into the applications, three different schools had given me different reasons I was not suitable for admission.
I began to experience a major form of discompose, such that my mind became extremely agitated. Which I suspected was partly because my confidence and expectations were high based on previous experiences with successful applications.
Some activities like my eating and sleeping habits, exercising were affected. My blog also suffered a set back as couldn’t bring myself to finish up any post at all in those moments. Not aslo forgetting to mention I had suffered chickenpox around that period.
It got so intense that I find myself giving excuses. Like everything I’d like to write about has already been written by someone else. And probably more invigorating than anything I would have come up with.
Other times I find myself saying let me think of something else. And I eventually just have nothing to write about. I was unable to decide on a realistic content, and I had nothing interesting to actually update on my blog.
Distractions or Excuses
It is always so easy especially in the face of pressure to call it quits, and I’ve had my own share of such moments.
Going as far back as my undergraduate days when I was at the verge of a withdrawal and I didn’t know if I could go further or just pack my bags and head on home.
At the end of the day, it is important to be able to separate the feeling of being distracted from making excuses as to why we can’t.
As much as I felt these were sheer distractions that were entertained and led on by the fears that filled my thoughts, I had to look deep within to find new strength to get on with the original plan.
And don’t ask how, I might just end up giving you one of those inspirational quotes and hide behind it for safety. But the point is, I knew what I really wanted in all of these.
How I Handled The Situation? By Reigniting My Inspiration;
So at my break point, I prayed and had to remind myself all that I may have forgotten in the process of my struggles; I talked about it with my husband who is indeed the encourager.
I found new courage to start all over again. And for every application response (negative mind you) that came through I replaced with a new application.
I may sound like a broken record, but as of late July, I’ve bagged two admission offers and still waiting for more responses.
So now I have a fresh problem (which I’m actually enjoying), that is to decide which of the offers I actually would love to accept.
I hope someone who is at the verge of throwing in the towel gets encouraged by my chronicles. The situation may not be similar but the reaction could be.
It is not over yet, until one decides to give up; that’s when it is over.
There are many reasons why a person would want to give up, not good enough, too much to handle, not going as planned, inadequate resources for a project, plain tiredness, or little distractions, the list is endless.
But your dreams are your life’s purpose, so don’t give up. Just keep fighting for what you want. Not minding the hurdles you encounter along the way, because they stand as a reminder to you; they serve as check points on your journey. And you are most certainly now closer than when you first began.
Cheers and thank you for reading this.